When I was 12, I ran over a cockroach while riding my bicycle. This wasn’t just any cockroach. It was a pregnant one, and when I ran over her, eggs spewed out all over the place.
When I was 17, I ran over a frog with my moms car. The crunch the frog made under my tires still haunts me.
Tonight something happened that trumps both of those experiences.
I went to get the mail tonight and on the way out, I noticed a lizard on our door. That’s neat, I thought. After I get the mail, I’ll get my camera and take a picture of it for Connor. He’ll really like that a lizard lives on our door at night. When I opened the door, the lizard got a little startled and started running. I quickly closed the door. I think lizards are okay little creatures, but I certainly don’t want one inside my house running around. I went to get my camera, and when I got to the door I noticed a little lizard leg poking in. Oh no, I thought. His leg is caught. it was much, much worse than a caught leg. When I hastily closed the door, I completely smushed him. Guts hanging out, blood on my door smushed him. He was still twitching.
I immediately called Derek, who happens to be out of town. I was freaking out and I didn’t know what to do. Leave him? But I couldn’t do that. I could see his leg from inside my house and he would get all dried and crusty before Derek get’s home. Derek said just to get a paper towel and pick him of. Ummm…hello?! I can barely do that with dead spiders, much less 5 inch, sitll a bit alive, smashed lizards! I decided I would get the hose and spray him off. But then I realized that he was stuck in such a way that with my door closed he completely disappers (minus the leg). If I try to spray him off with the hose, I will soak the inside of our nice, new house. Not gonna happen.
So what did I do? First I called my sister to share the horrific situation and predicament. Then, I went to the neighbors house. The neighbor who I have only talked to one time, whose name I honestly can’t remember right this second. Being a nice, southern gentleman, he graciously agreed to help me get the lizard off the door. His two boys (ages 8 and 10) came with us. They thought it was the coolest thing ever. Blood, guts, and small amphibians. Does it get much better?
In my book, the lizard trumps the roach and the frog.