I will not be a pushover!

I have a tendency to be a people pleaser. Okay, I’ll admit it. It’s more than a tendency; it runs deep in my blood. I’ll do anything to avoid confrontation and conflict. I’m a lover, not a fighter. And, for some reason I desperately need people’s approval. I don’t think this is a completely bad trait to have, but there are certainly situations where it would be good to be not so people-pleaserarific (that should be a word.)

I feel like I have overcome a great hurdle today.

About 6 weeks ago a man from a company called Growing Family came out to our apartment and took pictures of Logan. This is really a great service. They take great, professional photos right in our living room. They bring a backdrop and everything. Anywho, they offered me a free 8×10 so I could’t resist scheduling an appointment. Today, a lady named Shirley came back to have me look at the proofs and buy pictures. We did this with Connor and I was suckered into spending WAY too much money on the pictures. I told myself I wouldn’t do that this time, no matter how cute they were.

Before she started her spiel, I told her that we were not in a place where I could spend a lot of money on pictures. She laughed and pulled up the pictures on her computer. They were SO cute. So many different expressions, just really cute pictures (of course I wouldn’t expect any different since Logan is super cute, right?) She then proceeds to tell me about the different packages, ranging from $450 to $200. I’m thinking to myself “Is this your definition of not a lot of money?”. I decline the packages and tell her I’ll considering buying one 5×7. I about wet my pants when she told me that ONE 5×7 is going to be $40 with shipping and tax! Are you freaking kidding me?! I tell her no thanks, I’ll just take my free 8×10. She then proceeds to offer me three 5×7’s and 3 sets of wallets for $100, including tax and shipping. Now, that’s not too bad of a deal, but it’s still $100 we don’t have. Against my better judgement I started to consider it. She was getting a little desperate and I started to feel sorry for her. I’m sure she works on commission and here she came all the way out to my house and I’m about to stiff her. My people pleaser tendency is coming to the surface and I’m about to say yes. But wait. Why is she being so pushy? Why didn’t she offer me this first when I told her I couldn’t spend much money? Despite my feelings of guilt raging inside, I say no thank you. I just want the free picture.

After she left, I felt a little guilty. But, slowly, I realized that this was really a small victory. I didn’t need the pictures. I went in saying I wouldn’t buy them and I stuck to my guns. I am proud to say, that just for today, I was a people dis-pleaser.

Mornings

We’re becoming a late morning family. Since it’s summertime and it stays light so long, Connor’s bedtime has gotten later and later. Instead of being in bed at 7:30, it’s now 8:30 and some nights he’ll talk to himself for an hour. The great thing about the later nights is the later mornings. He usually wakes up between 8:30 and 9:00 and I love it! When I was a kid, summertime always meant staying up later and sleeping in later. I’m glad that even though I’m an adult, the same rules apply.

Derek is loving the late mornings, too. He’s always gotten up at 8:30 or 9:00, but now he doesn’t have to feel guilty about it. I’m not sure he ever felt guilty about it, but in my opinion, he shoud have. Let me just say that it doesn’t make me very happy when we are all awake at 7:00 and Derek stays in bed until 8:30 (especailly if I have been up in the night). Now he gets to sleep in guilt free and wake up to a happy wife instead of a mad one. The summertime hours have been great for our marriage!

Our mornings are always the same. We are definately creatures of habit. Every morning, I sit at the table with my iced hazelnut latte, checking my email and my blogs. Connor wakes up and asks for fruit snacks and every morning I remind him that fruit snacks are for after his nap. He settles for a granola bar and joins me at the table. This morning he wanted to listen to “the monkey song”- a.k.a If I had a Million Dollars by the Barenaked Ladies. (One line is “Haven’t you always wanted a monkey?”) Eventually Derek makes his way out to us. He makes his bagel with cream cheese, his almond latte and plants himself on the couch to either watch one of his tivoed shows or check his email. Mornings are a nice time. Everyone is fresh from good sleep. It’s a brand new day, full of possibilities. I love mornings.

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Yard Sale…iPod…Bumbo

I had my very first yard sale ever yesterday. My friend Beth and I have been planning on having one for the past 6 months. We finally got our act together and yesterday was the big day. It was a huge success! We were totally pumped to make about $450 combined.

I’ve had my eye on the pink iPod mini for about the past month. I couldn’t jusify spending the money on it since I just recently bought a new digital camera. But Derek and I discussed it and agreed that if I made enough at the garage sale I could get an iPod. I am now the proud owner of my very own pink iPod mini. I’m totally loving it-still trying to figure it all out-but loving it. I’m jamming to Jack Johnson “Better Together” right this second.

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I also recently purchased a bumbo seat for Logan. I just thought it looked like such a cool product. Baby L loves to sit up and take in the world but obviously he can’t do it on his own yet. He loves his Bumbo so far-plus he just looks so cute sitting in it. I would definatley recommend it to anyone who has a baby that likes to be upright.

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Bloggers Anonymous

I am starting to get really addicted to this blogging thing. Thanks a lot, Ryan. I hold you personally responsible for this new obsession.

I spent several hours this afternoon working on my new banner. I tried to get it done during nap time (in which there was absolutely no napping going on), but it wasn’t enough time. Three Elmo videos later and voila! A new banner. What do you think? I must admit I’m pretty proud of myself. I’ve never done much in photoshop except crop and resize, so this was a big step up.

Every evening, instead of watching TV, scrapbooking, reading, etc, I get on my computer and I read blogs. I read my ever lengthening list of regulars and I look for new ones to read and obsess over. I am a regular blog stalker. I can’t even begin to list the number of blog crushes I have. Even that phrase came from a blog I stalk, Emily’s Blog. What’s the proper blog etiquette? Should I comment on theses stranger’s blogs and tell them how cool I think their blogging is? I want to come out of the blog readers closet! I think one of these days I will go comment crazy and everyone will know how many blogs I stalk. Watch out for that Megan chick. She’s a freak!

As promised…my favorite botany

Let me introduce you to the jacaranda tree.

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I love these trees. I had never seen one until I moved to Cali. They only bloom for a few weeks and then it rains purple flowers as the blossoms fall. It’s beautiful. If you are ever come to California in May or June you can witness the beauty of a blooming jacaranda. I will miss seeing these trees when we move.

Insomniac

Having kids has turned me into and insomniac. Even though both boys technically sleep through the night most of the time, I would venture to say a lot of nights I do not. I’m up at least once, maybe because Logan needs his paci or Connor needs “fresh water”. Or somtimes it’s because I’m hot or otherwise uncomfortable. There are a host of factors contributing to my insomnia, most of which I don’t even understand. All I know is it’s only been in the past two and a half years that this all started.

It’s 2:04 in the morning right now. I should be in bed, curled up next to Derek sleeping. But instead, I’m blogging. What’s wrong with me?! Tonight, after I got Logan settled back down, I sat in the rocking chair in the boys room and listened to Connor’s steady breathing and Logan’s rhythmic sucking. I was just overcome with love for these two little people that I had a hand in creating. Just amazing. I sat in the chair for a long time, just marveling in the miracle of my two boys. I’m reminded of a quote that I’ve read in several different places: “Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.” ~Elizabeth Stone That’s so true.

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There are several things that usually happen when I can’t sleep.

1) I almost always get hungry. I usually don’t eat anything because I don’t like to eat in the middle of the night. But, my stomach always growls. If I do eat, it’s always a bowl of Life cereal. That’s my favorite insomniac snack.

2) I think of really random things. Since I’ve started blogging, these random things are usually things that I think I should blog about. Tonights random musings included my all time favorite California botany (the jacaranda tree), the similarity between the words insomniac and maniac, and two new recipes I want to try, one for pork chops and one for tri-tip. Which one should I make first?

3) I start to get really irritated with myself for even being awake. That only makes it harder to go back to sleep. I start thinking about how hard it’s going to be to get up in the morning and how miserable I will be until I can catch a nap in the afternoon.

4) Things start to get a little foggy. My thoughts stop making sense. My eyes get heavy and I know that sleep will be here soon. That’s where I am right now.

Peace out.

Today

We watched the Today show this morning, which is very unusal for us. Usually the tv is either off or on Noggin for Connor. I saw two interesting things this morning on Today.

First, this manKozo Haraguchi set a world record. He ran the 100 yard dash is just over 22 seconds. Not that fast until you consider that he is 95 years old!

thehourglass.jpg Then, right after that story, it cut to Matt and Al outside with none other than Mark Summers, the host of Double Dare! Oh, how I loved that show! I would have given anything to be on it. I was so jealous of the kids who got to do the obstacle course. And I always felt bad when they couldn’t find the flag among the dropping balls or slime. I knew if I just had the chance I would have smashed all Double Dare records and been the big winner.

I wish I could find Double Dare reruns on TV.

Happy Father’s Day

When I married Derek 5 years ago, I knew he would be a great father. It’s one of the reasons I chose him as my husband. I wanted to marry a man who shared in my dream of having a big family and who was excited to be a dad someday. Derek is a wonderful dad to Connor and Logan. He’s selfless, loving, patient, kind, fun, and about a million other things that I can’t even put into words.

Derek, thank you for loving me, for loving our kids, and for being such a wonderful husband and father. Connor, Logan, and I are lucky to have you. I love you.

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