Life Expentacy of a Lizard

*Preface*
I’ve had this entire entry wriiten out in my head for the past three days, but I had to get the perfect picture and the perfect moment to write it. I have actually answered the age-old question: what is the life expentancy of a lizard in a dire situation? You’ll have to read down to the bottom to get the answer.

It’s no secret that we regularly have lizards in our house…and I freak out every single time I find one. If you need a refresher course on the lizard saga, this is a good blog post to read. Ever since that fateful day, the lizards are out to get me. I even found one in my closet once, which is just one step away from my bed which I know is their ultimate goal.

Last week, I believe it was Tuesday, I went in the garage and saw something skitter out of the corner of my eye. Upon closer inspection, I discovered it was a baby lizard. I guess because it was in my garage and so tiny, I didn’t freak out at all. I just thought to myself “I sure hope he can find his mom.” A week passed. I did my nightly lizard check in our entry way and saw the baby lizard.

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I knew there was no way to catch him-correct that-for Derek to catch him, because he was so small. So I just left him and checked him everyday to make sure he didn’t find my cozy bed. And for three days, he has been right there. Sometimes he’ll move onto the actual window. And I started to feel a little sorry for the critter. I knew there were only two possible outcomes: either he would figure out a way to get down from the window and go outside, or he would eventually die without access to food, water, and toilet. I wondered how long this would take.

I now know the answer. Three days. I just checked on him and he’s dead as a doornail. I did have a mini panic attack when he wasn’t on the window. But I guess when lizards die, their feet lose their sticky. I am mostly relieved because I can sleep without fear of lizards in my bed. I am a little sad for him becuase he was just a baby. And I am a slightly apprehensive because not only have I crushed one in the door, I have killed the baby. If they weren’t out to get me before, I am sure that they are now.

Ahhh…date night

Because I am a girl and it is completely acceptable to take pictures of oneself, here I am just moments before leaving for our date tonight. I actually fixed my hair for the first time in I don’t know how long. The Houston humidity is not good for my mane. Actually, if we are being honest, my hair problems really started when I got pregnant. With each pregancy, my hair got a little bit thicker and a little bit curlier, but not super curly, just curly enough that it’s a pain to straighten, and every once in awhile if the weather and timing is perfect I have nice curls, or I have nice straight-ish hair. But that is rare. However, with perserverence of heart, Connor sleeping, and Logan entertained by the Wiggles and a baggie of cereal, I dried my locks all the way dry and left it down. This is nothing short of a miracle. My own husband commented on it. Actually, I believe his comment was “wow, you have a lot of hair.”, said as he walked up to me from afar in Target. I believe what he actually meant to say was “I could see you a mile away because of the semi-afro that you are sporting tonight.”

Anyway, I digress.

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We went to the Cinema Grill for our date. Dinner and a movie, all at the same time. It’s such a time efficient date. And affordable when you have a coupon for two free movie tickets and a buy one get one free meal coupon. I’m glad that our date was affordable so that we could go to Target to buy diapers and toilet paper. Oh, and a video game, and a new outfit. So cheap date turned into expensive date, but the mama and dad are happy, so it’s all good.

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Can we please get a behind view of the afro?

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I believe in another 6 months, or maybe a year, I will have enough hair to cut off to donate to Locks of Love. And I will be super skinny with super cute haircut. I will be hot, no doubt about it.

And on a totally different subject…Mary worked at the pool today. Ughh. I really need to write a letter and complain. She a real piece of work. And after a little convo with some other moms, I can say without a doubt that I am not the only one with Mary issues.

PS-every time I type the name Mary, I think that I am writing about Mary from 7th Heaven.

Happy Wednesday, my few faithful blog readers!

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This is what we did today. Well, the part I want to remember, anyway. I won’t mention the thrown library book that hit Logan in the head, the shopping trip that ended with being rammed by the shopping cart, the game called “take all the toys of the shelves and put them in the laundry baskets then throw a fit when it’s time to clean up, leading mom to threaten to throw away every toy on the floor.” I won’t mention the fact that I am absolutely going crazy trying to keep Logan off the kitchen table, or that I bought “fresh” salmon for a delicious dinner tonight only to be knocked over by the smell of old fish when I opened it at 5:15. I won’t mention that I started weight watchers in an attempt to lose this 15 pounds that Logan so graciously bestowed upon me, plus the extra 5 that Connor contributed, and therefore I have been hungry all day in an effort to stay below my 22 point limit. I won’t mention the mosquito bite I got yesterday that has swelled to size of a quarter and makes me want to claw my skin off it itches so bad. And I certainly won’t mention the grief my wonderful husband gave me for buying an issue of US Weekly at the grocery store in an attempt to get my mind off the incredibly long day I was having.

Or maybe I will mention it. Because it’s my blog and I can mention whatever I want. But when I look back at this entry (because, yes, I complusively check my own blog), what I want to see first are those pictures of my boys living it up.

Tomorrow night Derek and I are going on a long overdue date. I absolutely cannot wait.

Teenagers with attitude

I am sure when I was a teenager, I never had an attitude. What, mom? You say I did? Okay, well I am sure that I did sometimes. But I would like to think that I never copped an attitude with the patrons at my place of employment.

The boys and I are regulars at our neighborhood swimming pool. I think this pool is just about the greatest thing ever. It’s big, it’s got lots of shaded tables and comfortable lounge chairs. It’s very clean. It has a shaded baby pool that Logan loves. And this totally blows my mind-it’s hardly ever crowded. I love our pool. But I have encountered something that takes my pool love down a notch.

The lifeguards. The teenage, I’m-really-cool-because-I’m-a-lifeguard, I-only-want-this-job-for-the-tan, lifeguards. There are 2 in particular who absolutely drive me crazy. I’ll call them Taylor and Mary (because those are their real names. There is no protection of the innocent on this blog.) They are the weekend lifeguards. I love the guards during the week-they are fabulous. Very friendly, helpful, nice, and laid back on the rules in certain situations.

Yesterday at the pool, Mary blew her whistle and yelled at Logan to walk. Logan. He’s 15 months old. If blowing a whistle and shouting out a command worked for 15 month old kids, parenting at this age would be much, much easier. And let’s be honest. How fast do you think Logan runs? He’s chubby, plus his legs are only about 14 inches long. Nice one, Mary.

The last 10 minutes of every hour, kids are required to get out of the pool for adult swim. While I think that adult swim is pretty silly because the pool is never crowded at all, I understand it’s just the policy. Today Mary blew her whistle and shouted “adult swim.” I looked at her and thought she was joking. Honestly, I said “are you kidding me?” Connor and I were the only ones at the pool today. The pool sat empty for adult swim, because the only adult there was ME! The weekday lifeguards skip adult swim if it’s obvious that it’s only mom’s there with their kids, but not Mary. No. Not Mary.

Mary and Taylor were cleaning the tiles today, so they were both in the pool when Connor and I were out. We jump back in (into the shallow end, mind you). And Mary looks at me, and with this sassy little attitude says “will you please tell us before you get back in so one of us can get in the guard chair? It’s the rule.” Um, okay. I don’t really think we were at risk for drowning, seeing as I was A.) holding Connor in the shallow end. and B.) Connor wears a flotation device bathing suit, and C.) Mary was standing in the water literally 6 feet away from us.

Connor puts on his sandles for the walk home. He takes 3 steps and crumbles onto the groud, crying because of a raw blister. We are still the only ones at the pool, so sure the guards noticed a writhing 3 year old in a neon green spandex suit. So I calmly pick Connor up and tell him we will get a bandaid from the lifeguards.

Taylor jumps in the pool.

“Excuse me, can I get a band-aid for his foot?”

Taylor turns to us with this look on his face like I have just asked him to drive 45 minutes out of the way to pick me up a decaf double tall skinny latte, steamed to 182 degrees, with exactly 3 drops of caramel syrup, not sauce. (yes, I know someone who orders coffee like that…)

“Does he really need one?”
“umm…he’s got a blister right where his sandle is. He really can’t walk home.”
“ughhhhh. It’s just that I have to fill out paperwork and everything.”
“for a band-aid?! Okay, nevermind. He can just suffer.”
“no, no. I’ll get it.” Insert huge eye roll.

Connor and I sit down. And wait. And wait some more.

“Um, Mary? Where are the gloves? I can’t find the rubber gloves and this kid wants a band-aid.”

I interject.
“I can put it on his foot if you can just give me the band-aid. It’s not really even bleeding. It’s just an open blister that hurts.”

Mary informs Taylor that they don’t need gloves or the report, and just to give us a band-aid. Thanks Mary. You finally got something right.

Connor is happy, I am not so happy, and we leave without so much as a good-bye from the guards because they are too busy complaining about how many hours our pool is open every week.

Thank goodness tomorrow is Monday.

It’s about flippin’ time!

Rememeber this little project?

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A month later, I am finally finished! Well, I shouldn’t say finished, really. I still have a few spots to touch up and I want to put a fresh coat of paint on the cabinets and door frames. I am so happy with how it turned out! I had a little freak out moment when we got done painting. The walls don’t look perfect, due to the damage from stripping wallpaper. But once the new towel rods, shower curtain, and accessories were up, I was totally happy. And let me say it right here, right now. I.will.never.wallpaper.my.house. Ever.

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Side B

I’m not married to what you would call a “sports fan”. Derek just isn’t into it. Now, he appreciates sports, likes playing sports, but as far as watching…it’s just not his thing. Sure, he watches the Superbowl almost every year, but sometimes he doesn’t even know who’s playing until the game starts. And we both watched the 4th quarter of the Mavericks game this week, and we were bummed when they lost, just like any good sports fan.

But that has all changed with a little event called the World Cup. Soccer is definitely Derek’s sport, and I am seeing a side of him I have never seen before. He records all the games that come on, and when he gets home from work he plops down on the couch and watches the game. He yells at the tv. He calls me in to see the amazing plays, a guy tear his ACL, a really bad call, etc. I could tell you when the US is playing again, who they are playing, who else is in their bracket, and exactly what needs to happen for them to advance to the next round.

I feel like I am married to a real sports man now. On more than one occasion, he has said “but the games on” when asked to do something. That phrase really makes me laugh, because 9 times out of 10, he’s watching a tivoed game. He just doesn’t want to pause because he’s into it.

I may sound like I am complaining, but I really don’t mind at all. Maybe it would bug me more if he were like this about every sport. I can certainly handle sports crazy Derek once every 4 years. I just keep waiting for him to paint his face, buy a World Cup t-shirt, wear one of those obnoxious hats the real fans wear, and join a fantasy soccer league. Then Derek’s transition from scientist to sports fanatic would be complete.

Everyone has a lowrider

I took the boys to the library today. Captain Disaster was out in full force, knocking books off the shelf several times…I swear the kid is like Inspector Gadget, go go gadget arms and all. No matter how far away I parked his stroller, he still managed to reach the books. Besides the fact that I was the mom with the noisy, messy kids, we had a good time. I let Connor check out 5 books. He chose 2 fire truck books, one about big rigs, one about freight trains, and one about lowriders. That’s right, lowriders. He has learned all about hydraulics, pimped out interiors, art on cars (art being paintings of skulls, or Betty Boop.) The funniest part is that he thought it was a book about pick up trucks, and honestly, so did I. I was busy cleaning up after the wrath of Logan to do more than glance at the books Connor checked out. But upon closer inspection, it’s not even a truck on the cover. It’s some sort of convertible Chrysler. Cool. Very cool.

And just because I love to post pictures, here is my current favorite one of Connor. I totally bribed him to take this picture.

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Summer in Full Swing

*I went to the beach yesterday. And surfed! It was so amazing and fun. I went with my sis-in-law, Kathy, her two kiddos, and a bunch of people from her church. They do a thing called Surf Camp where they teach people to surf, hang out at the beach, and have a little worship and lesson. So fun. Kathy was rockin’ the surfboard, too. Yesterday totally inspired me to get a surfboard and go to the beach down here more often. You would think that Galveston would pale in comparison to California beaches, but I have to say…I was never a fan of going to the beach in California. The traffic, the fighting for a parking spot, more traffic…it only led to acute road rage and ruined any fun at the beach. But Galveston is different. Sure, it’s only the Gulf of Mexico, but the water is warm, the sand is heaven for the boys, the waves are perfect for a wimpy surfer like myself, it’s just a 35 minute zip down the freeway, and parking flows like milk and honey. I forsee many more trips to the beach this summer.

*We have a mosquito infestation. I swear some of them are the size of small birds. Remember the movie My Girl where Macaulay Culkin’s character gets swarmed by bees and dies? I relived that scene yesterday in my yard, only insert mosquitos instead of bees. “His glasses…he can’t see without his glasses…” Gets me every time. Anyway, we have stocked up on bug spray, citronella candles, and Derek applied some special spray poison last night. I sure am glad that my boys can either play in a yard covered in posion or get West Nile…I will win this battle against the mosquitos. Mark my words.

*We are grilling out all the time now. Definitely a sign of summer.

*Okay, so Houston is hot. But I think I am acclamating to it. It reminds me of my childhood-warm summer evenings and lazy afternoons spent inside when it’s too hot to go outside. The constant sticky feeling reminds me of Sooner Youth Camp, which always brings a smile to my face.

*We are about to become regulars at our neighborhood pool. I love swimming and being in the sun.

*It’s all about the tank tops baby. And flip flops. But flippys aren’t so much a sign of summer to me since I wear them year round. Even when it’s cold and possibly raining. I love my flops.

Yup. No doubt about it. Summer is here!

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Graduation, Friends, Home Turf, and the Star Mover

We had a great trip back to Cali. It was so weird being there…it still feels like home. Everything is so familar and I just kept wanting to go back to our little apartment. I forgot how long it takes to make really good friends like we had in California, and how long it takes for a new place to feel like home. We’ve been in Houston 6 months, and it doesn’t feel quite right yet. Not like Cali did.

Anyway, we had a fabulous trip. We saw lots of friends, had a great adventure at a waterpark (for full details, check this out. My brother’s girlfriend Noel met us at the waterpark and we had so much fun.)

One highlight of the trip was of course Derek’s graduation.
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How’s this for a family picture? The cheesy smiles on this totally crack me up!
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The other highlight was just seeing and spending time with all our old friends. This is Connor’s best gal, Malia.

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And here’s Malia, JD, and Connor. I didn’t get a picture with Logan or with the newest baby, Kiana (who was only a week old when we visited!)

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I’m sure there are a million little stories to tell about our trip, and I am sure they will leak out on here occasionally as I remember them. As for now, I am just plain tired after travelling yesterday. We had to leave at 4:15 yesterday morning to make our flight. But I will leave you with one little Connor story.

We are at the aiport yesterday getting all checked in curbside. It was still dark out, but Connor was wearing his standard uniform these days-his yellow bike helmet and his purple sunglasses (choose your battles, Megan…choose your battles..) The sky cab man says “Hey dude, you look like a movie star wearing your sunglasses in the dark!” Connor turns to me, laughing, and says “Mom, he says I look like a star mover!”

(note to self…take a picture of the star mover soon!)

Tomatoes for real!

Last week I had a sad tale of three tomatoes. There is much celebrating in my heart today. Check it:

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I am not a tomato person. I never have been. But let me just tell you that this tomato was good I have revised my previous feelings of tomato hate. I just don’t like store bought tomatoes. Homegrown…that’s a whole other story.